Why God?

Hmmm yesterday, when I really needed you the most Lord, huhh I really can't take this anymore. Yesterday, my step-father, was strangling my mother, and was asking her, if she had another man. My mother kept telling him no.... but his guilty conscience was bothering him, because, he has another woman, but "he claims" he doesn't....Now tell me, could we be so fucking stupid?? you will not come home for a night and two days, and say the tyre was flat, and there was nothing he could do because he didn't have a spare, but! you come home fresh, like yuh now done bathe, huuuhh, well people who know me, will know that I will not stand there and that happening to my mother... I just ran into the kitchen to pick up something sharp, well who would have thought that the "chinese chopper" would be on the counter... well me, shaking with rage, just went up into his face and said, leave my so and so mother alone, he say if I don't keep out, I will share the same faith as my mom, well that got me more riled up, I said bring it on, yuh bush coolie, I 'don't fraid you' well god knows I was a little scared eh, because suppose he went to pick up something, but I know the Holy spirit wouldn't have let me down...... but when he was cussing me, my lil sis went with her brave self,and said leave my mommy and my sister alone! THE JACKASS pulled my sister and started beating her, and hard to, well I just snatched her, and pushed her into her bedroom, although she was real crying, but if she had stayed he might have hit her more, I slapped him, he tried to slap me but didn't succeed, because my mom held back his hand

And you know what's the amazing part, he thought my mom had a man because, she had to go to the hospital later that evening to get her medicine! huhhhhh and then after all of that, he finally admitted that he had in fact, been seeing another woman, and I just got so mad yesterday, and the only friend that was available was Linkin Park, because, I really don't wanna tell my friends that, because, I just don't wanna burden them.... I called my big sister this morning and let out everything, she got so mad, and wished she lived closer, but she left me with some good words, but that man left my lil sis scarred for life, lastnight she cried, and was only saying,I lost my daddy to a woman, and she was saying I want my daddy back, She went on her KNEES, and prayed and asked god that her parents don't get a divorce....... well just writing that, makes my heart so full, and my eyes full of water, because such a young delegate soul, has to feel so much hurt..... Huhhh I really tried to be strong with her lastnight eh, but I broke down, not for him, but for the condition he left my baby girl in, god why? why my lil sis have to feel so hurt? I wish I could take away all her pain, and inflict it on myself, no little child should feel so down she started to talk about how life was, I don't want her dwelling on the past, I want her to think about how tomorrow will be......... this isn't right, and my mom why her too? my mom is such a devoted mother and wife, and the thing is my mom so numb, she ain't even cry, the lady wouldn't cry for nothing,,,,,,,,,,huh