*Sigh* I feel stupiddddd

Right about now, I'm really hurt. I shouldn't be, because its a stupid thing, My two very good Friends, Gina and the one who had dengue fever, Shazard [who is better btw], kept something from me, because they knew it would hurt..........and to tell you the truth it really really is hurting So Bad, I don't even know how to start to explain this, it's just so.... arghh! ok, I love my two friends with all my heart and I know they want whats best for me, but now I really wish that they had kept it to theirself. Okay now I know I said I wasn't ready for a relationship, but up out of nowhere comes this dude [shazard's friend] and he just seemed so different, and I was starting to fall for his crap, but one night when Shaz was liming with him, he was telling someone else, that the only reason he wants to form a relationship with me, is so that he can take my virginity, and then leave me after, well hummmmm that really hurt, because if thats all he wanted he is a jerk, BUT HE WAS NEVER GONNA GET IT!!! because I'm not easy, but still I mean Oh gossssssssssshhhhhhhhh! is that all going through boys minds???!!!! I feel so, i dunno, i nah feeling to find a word in the dictionary...... and they both knew since last week, and I could sense something was wrong because when I was talking to G, I could see something in eyes, that just wanted to tell me something, But they told me act like I don't know, but that is like soooooo hard for me to do, I just wanna cuss out dat mother fucker right now! and I really don't know how he have "d belly" to call me still, after saying or thinking of doing that, thats why when he called lastnight and this morning I said I'm studying, but I know I'm gonna crack sooner or later, because that asshole calls about 3 times for the day, I just don't know, I better tell him I'm gay or something lol, i still hav humor in the midst of it lmao, that wouldn't be good neither, that might just make the fellow even more happy lmfao ...no but seriously, I need to know what to do, I was thinking of making him fall in love, like deeply in love, with my personality [trust me that is very easy to do] and then STOMP ON HIS DIRTY LITTLE HEART!!! and make him suffer! and get "Tabanka" SHUX man I hate You Mr.Hussain with all my heart I hope you marry a very pretty wife, who gives you your 'farm' that you always talk about, and then,, when she make 25 chirren fuh yuh ass, she horn yuh, and lefff yuh ass with all 25 chirren to see about!! yuh mudda c***** I really am sorry for my beautiful language but right now I can't censor my blog.